I try to fill myself with distractions because without them Im alone with my thoughts. I cant be alone with my thoughts. So I hang out with people I dont like, do things I dont want to do, talk to people I cant stand listening to just for distraction. Because when left alone there is only HER. Big eyes, small nose, short frame. Everything is her. I walk past flowers in the grocery store HER, I her rihanna and drake HER, I see flour and I immediately think of fried chicken HER. She lost her grandmother and all I could do is send an anonymous text to HER. I wanted to hold HER, be there for HER, console HER, take the trip to Indiana with HER but I couldnt. An anonymous text conveying the tip of an iceberg of emotions I have for HER. I go to work 2 jobs and spend nothing with the hopes that when I pay HER back I will be allowed to be in HER presence again. But alas I only have thoughts of HER, dreams of HER, memories of HER.
I miss HER
WHYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY would you sit next to me and you are the LOUDESTTTTTTTTT eater alive !!!!!!
she was the kind of girlfriend god gives you young, so you’ll know loss for the rest of your lifeJunot Diaz (via chipotlechickenburrito)
No medicine and sleep vs medicine and being awake 21 hrs a day…..hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm